Penalised for Having a Medical Condition?
I am Mummy to three children. They are all amazing, they have big personalities and even bigger hearts. Each has their own strengths and weaknesses, their own interests and are growing into three wonderful humans. Two of them have medical conditions, and one of them has food allergies - lots of allergies and they are getting worse. They are part of what makes him who he is, yet they do not define him. He lives with them like an absolute warrior, he is unshakably brave about them, holds his head up high and gets on with life.
He accepts that everything he eats must always be checked first. He never complains, just gets on with it in his own unassuming way. I fight for him ALL THE TIME, I am his biggest advocate, and I worry about him ALL THE TIME. I have spent night after night writing letters, completing forms, pouring over ingredients, looking up the origins of E numbers, and digging into the very depths of all the internet can offer.
Every week I find myself explaining to people what allergies really mean to people who live with them. Yes, for some people they can have mild symptoms such as hay fever or a rash but allergies can also be very dangerous to health, and that’s the reality. There are life-threatening risks that my smallest child has to take every single day.
Whenever I send him to school or to an activity, I have to put my trust in others. Yet they can only do so much because they cannot control if another child had nuts for breakfast for instance and didn’t wash their hands after touching a food that my son is allergic to. I do however expect schools to provide a safe environment in which children can thrive and are never made to feel any less than their peers because of their medical conditions. Allergy is a medical condition they have NO control over and one they did not choose. Nor did any other child with a medical condition that requires them to have time off school. They did not choose to be ill or to attend (often painful and upsetting) medical appointments.
Towards the end of the Summer Term, my middle child came bouncing out of school, she has been given a 99% Attendance Certificate and couldn’t wait to show me. I was so pleased for her but torn in two right there in the playground. My youngest was now standing next to me, also looking at the certificate, broken-hearted - realising that this school competition was one he would never, ever be able to compete in.
Where was his certificate? His certificate to congratulate him for showing up to every single hospital appointment, facing every single allergic reaction that he has had with sheer bravery, having allergy test after test, and then going back to school feeling battered and bruised? Where is the certificate for every other child in the school with a chronic medical condition who fights and fights every single day?
There are so many sides to this argument I know. Attendance Certificates in Primary schools are supposed to be an incentive for children to attend school. But should children at this age really be rewarded for this when ultimately it is their parent's or carer’s decision whether they are well enough to be in school? Do Attendance Certificates really encourage children to attend school when they aren’t well enough to? We all know how quickly a stomach bug moves through a classroom. But I can state without hesitation, that they can also cause emotional damage. You can trust me on this one, any child with a medical condition feels bad enough as it is, without being judged for their less-than-perfect attendance as well.
So schools, next year, I challenge you before you print these certificates, please just take a step back and think about whether the benefit you assume the certificates give, really outweighs the pain they can also cause.
Written by @Roselleambrose
